Friday, June 15, 2007

Bone Tongue & The Shakers of Fire

After spending a pleasant evening spinning through the streets of the city De Layed with BoneShakers Bill, Tony, Pasco & Aaron, The Supreme Overlord Gravox noticed some interesting (at least from an anthropological perspective) features to this unique species. After ferociously guzzling a variety of beverages it became obvious they were in desparate need of a very specific type of sustainance. With ever increasing urgency came their guttural demands for "a filthy dirty", "a beef and shit","a dirty asian" and more. Such was their need for these strange foods that when we arrived at a possible vendor only to find it had been stolen by aliens the onset of a strange condition to which the BoneShakers are prone, "Cranio Cratification", became apparent in at least one member. Luckily the quick thinking Jimmy Stash guided us to a nearby yiros shop where we were able to at least placate most them temporarily. Unfortunately the vegetable content was too high and the meat content too low for one of the group who had already been forced to eat his "dry smoke". This drove him into an inconsolable rage with much incoherent raving, throwing of the offending yiros, violent displays including the distinctive BoneShaker "flush" all interspersed with manic cackling.
All we can derive from this valuble experience is that if out with the BoneShakers it is vitally important to memorise the location of these food sources or at the very least have some meat handy until the correct victuals are obtainable.


Blogger TallBikes said...

Hear me out oh S-O-Gravox... Monkey have plan.

One cant help but speculate what would happen if BoneShakerBill was faced off with jousting stick and a vegan?

If thats what he dose to a yiros with 2 little meat in it what would he do to a vegan with no meat in it at all???

we may have found our beer fueled secrete weapon?

Heres the monkey plan;
we let him get suitably drunk, deny him cigarettes and pies, pop him on a tall bike with a jousting stick and watch these vegan couriers who Oh so brashly challenged us go flying! then claim all the victory spoils for the tongue...he will be undefeatable!!!!

It was a fun ride, go the shakers!

10:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I believe that your editorial needs a lot to be desired. This could not possibly be the good family man that everyone loves so much. Hang on a second,now that you mention it, this bloke has been known to devour meat - just a whole roast or two in the one sitting,and as for that pet bunny that used to live in the back yard, well maybe you do have a point there. Can someone please check the two chickens that resided in the backyard. Oh yes, and what about that mongrel cat! much loved by two daughters.what was his name again............

7:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

cigarettes and pies?? he resembles that remark!

7:55 PM  

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